The Map Magazine

This attractive appetizer is easier to make than it looks and it is great to make a day ahead for a party

Ingredients

Nutrition Details

Nutrition Features

• Blend cream cheese, garlic and hot pepper sauce in a small bowl until smooth.
  
• Lightly spray 12-inch (30 cm) piece of wax paper with non-stick cooking spray or lightly brush with vegetable oil. Place paper on flat cutting board or plate. Spread cheese mixture on oiled paper in an 8-inch (20 cm) square. Chill while preparing filling or longer if desired.
  
• Mash drained oysters with lemon rind and green onions. Spread over cheese, leaving a -inch (6 mm) border. Roll up jelly roll style allowing cheese to roll away from paper. Seal by twisting ends of paper and place on board or plate and refrigerate at least 2 hours or up to 24 hours.
  
• Mix seeds and parsley on another piece of wax paper; unroll chilled log onto the seed mixture and roll to coat all sides. Serve with crackers or party rye bread.

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These flavour-packed Puffs give new meaning to the phrase - big taste comes in tiny packages! Great for cocktail parties, office events and family pot-lucks.

Ingredients

Nutrition Details

Nutrition Features

In a mixing bowl, lightly shred the Lobster Delectables. Add the next five ingredients and stir to combine. Lay the wonton wrappers on a clean dry work surface with the corners turned in a diamond shape. In the centre of each wonton, place about 2 tsp (10 mL) of the filling. Moisten the top half of the diamond with a dab of water or egg white, and bring the bottom half up, sealing the triangle. Turn the two side points of the triangle towards each other and press the tips together. Store in the refrigerator, lightly covered on a baking sheet, until needed.

To cook: Place in fryer or a hot wok with preheated oil at 360F (185C) for about 5 minutes until golden brown and crispy. Rotate occasionally. Remove from oil, drain and serve with dipping sauce.

Option: Garnish with thinly sliced green onions and toasted sesame seeds.

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In the world of birds, ruffled feathers is one sign of a virus.
Isn’t that also the case at work? Ruffled feathers can spread
like a virus throughout your office, department or corporation.
Depending on the influence of the ‘ruffled one’, that spread can
be fatal.

Infected birds shed the virus by exhaling and excreting. Isn’t
this what happens in the workplace? Gossip and anger can quickly
change the workplace environment from healthy to malicious. And,
it’s very contagious.

When words are involved, a high level of refinement of the virus
is possible. Stories change subtly. Emphasis is given to
different aspects by different people. Additions are appended.
Motives are questioned. Assumptions are made. Often, the initial
act becomes entirely unrecognizable in a very short time.

What to do? Be H.I.P.!

Here are three tips for smoothing ruffled feathers as soon as
you notice them. If you are the ‘ruffler’, implement these
immediately. If you are the ‘ruffled’, these work for you as
well.

BE HONEST

OK, you may be thinking, ‘It was honesty that got me into this
position in the first place!” True, you may have blurted out
some unvarnished truth in a moment of frustration. That’s often
the fastest way to ruffle a few feathers.

Now that you have calmed down some, it is time for a different
kind of honesty. First, be honest with yourself. What was your
intention when you opened your mouth? Did you intend to inflict
pain? Did you intend to create tension and dissention? Did you
really just want to smack the other person and you did it with
your words? Or, were you just a little clumsy in trying to
rectify a frustrating situation?

Now, if you are completely honest, it is likely that you so
wanted rid of your frustration that you were lacking a little
finesse. Right? If that is the case, you can now go to the
person you ruffled and truthfully say that hurt was not your
intent. Be honest about your outburst and identify it as a less
than effective way of releasing your pain. Ask if you can
discuss the issue and work out a solution that is acceptable to
you both.

Oh, so, you really did want them to feel small, dumb and
inferior? You’re on your own…likely looking for a new
position. Of course, if you’re the boss and you did this, you’re
also on your own…looking for new employees!

BE IMMEDIATE

Let no grass grow under your feet. As soon as you have calmed
down or thought better of your words, go to the other person and
acknowledge what’s going on. Take responsibility for your part
in the interaction. Don’t let this fester or spread.

Different people react differently to pain and stress. Some will
internalize it and make themselves very uncomfortable, even
unwell. Others will spread it around. This is the virus.

As soon as you can–as soon as your blood pressure is back to
normal, your vision improves and the blood has returned to your
centers of reason and logic–take responsibility for what you
have done or said. CAUTION: At this point, there is a tendency
to degenerate into sentences involving the word ‘You’. This is
not the time for that. Speak only about yourself and your
feelings. This takes practice.

Why be immediate? Because pain swells things. You’ve noticed
that. You need to put ice on the situation right away. It’s that
simple.

BE POSITIVE

When folks are upset, there is a tendency to talk about what you
don’t want, won’t put up with and cannot stand any longer. Sure,
that releases your frustration, however, it does not move the
situation forward.

Talk about what you do want, what will help and what can smooth
the way for a better working relationship. Be positive. Assuring
folks that you want things to work is far better than screaming
about what isn’t working!

You don’t have to put on a ‘Pollyanna’ approach to be positive.
It is a simple flip of the mind-set. Switch from the past to the
future. “Let’s do it this way!” is much easier to hear than “I
hate it when you _____!”, isn’t it? Quick rule of thumb: Before
you open your mouth, run the words you are about to say through
your mind. Would you be able to hear it well? Would it help move
the situation to resolution? If the answer is “no”, you’ve got
time to change your words. If the answer is ‘yes’, then proceed
with assurance that you are working to create the best
consequences.

Any young duck can cruise through the pond knocking folks down.
Smoothing ruffled feathers takes maturity, intelligence and
willingness. Don’t be a dumb duck. Learn to calm the waters and
only create ripples that get you where you want to go!

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“Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”
George Santayana

“Why do I always wind up with the wrong person? I want someone
who is kind, loving, reliable and open. Yet my relationships are
always with men who are angry, hostile, emotionally unavailable
and cannot keep a job.”

“I want a woman who is emotionally stable and independent, but I
always wind up with women who are overly dramatic, tend to
hysteria and depend on me to make their decisions.”

These are common problems brought to me by clients. They blame
bad luck, coincidence or accident for winding up with the exact
opposite of the type of person they say they prefer in a
relationship.

One very attractive female marketing manager in her mid thirties
agonized - “If I went to a party and there were fifty men in the
room - and 49 were college graduates who were business or
professional men - and the 50th was a high-school dropout with a
felony police record - number 50 and I would somehow find each
other.”

We make our relationship choices based on life experiences
accumulated from childhood. We subconsciously integrate these
experiences and react from them to current situations.

Children’s psyches are like unwritten slates. The messages we
receive from our parents are stored upon them as if etched in
stone. We internalize these messages and accept them without
question as we mature because in the child’s mind, mommy and
daddy - who are our ultimate authority figures - said it is so!

When a little girl has a father who is physically present but
emotionally absent and does not provide her with the love and
nurturing she needs, she will grow up with a big empty space in
her heart where that love should have been. The message -
although unspoken - tells her that she is not important and not
deserving of love.

This little girl will subconsciously seek a man with her
father’s rejecting characteristics - so she can relive her
initial relationship - and this time she will win.

When a little boy grows up with a weak and dependent mother who
increasingly leans on him in his father’s absence, he is put in
an adult situation inappropriate to his years. Although in
manhood he states he resents female dependency, he is used to
taking the role of rescuer and naturally will gravitate to women
with emotional broken wings that need fixing.

In our adult relationships, we seek to create situations in
which we are comfortable - regardless of their dysfunctionality.
If you grew up in a chaotic home, you will subconsciously tend
to chaotic relationships. Our home environment, how we were
raised, is what we consider normal.

Our adult relationships follow a pattern. A simple exercise will
reveal that pattern to you. Write the names of all of the people
with whom you have had a significant relationship. Under each
name, list all the negative characteristics you can remember -
for instance: bad temper, continually late for dates, poor money
manager, etc.

After you have completed your list, review the character traits
that are shared by your dating partners. Circle or yellow
high-lite these recurring traits and you will see the emergence
of a pattern.

While discussing the concept of this article with a friend, she
was motivated to make the list and was uncomfortable with the
fact that these traits stood out among her three past serious
relationships: aggressive personality, alcoholism, and emotional
unavailability.

I helped my friend work thru her feelings about this new
realization as I did with my clients. Awareness of the pattern
is the first step to changing it. Talking about it with a
therapist or trusted friend is the next important step because
you are then exposing this destructive pattern to the light and
can carry this awareness with you when you begin your next
relationship.

Be assured - patterns are not etched in stone. They can be
changed with awareness and work.

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A woman’s skin is very important. It is important for a woman to have clean, clear radiant skin. There are many simple ways that a woman can keep her skin looking clean, healthy, and beautiful, and we will discuss a few of these ways.

There are many products on the market which can keep the skin looking lovely, better skin product, anti aging skin care products. Not every skin product is not good for all types of skin. A person with oily skin must use a certain type of product which is meant only for oily skin. Cleansers, toners, and make up for oily skin are usually made with alcohol. The alcohol in these products helps to dry out the oil. It is not a good idea for a person with oily skin to moisturize. This can make the problem worse.

When a person has dry skin, it is necessary that she also use products which are specifically designed for dry skin. These products are alcohol free which is necessary for dry skin. The alcohol tends to dry the skin out. Using make up without alcohol is also necessary. It is a good idea for a person with dry skin to moisturize as often as possible with a moisturizer designed for dry skin.

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